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Joke of the Day
"I hurt myself doing the Safety Dance."
Next Joke
"First Rule of Thesaurus Club: You don't talk, discuss, converse, speak, chat, confer, deliberate, gab, or gossip about Thesaurus Club."
"Does anyone have a good joke about essays/paper writing I can use?"
"Me: [crying so hard I can't breathe] why Waiter: [returning my plate] sorry, I thought you were done"
"[NSFW] What's green, and smells like pork? Kermit the Frog's finger."
"What do you call a slutty telescope? A horoscope."
"How do you hear a hormone? Pay $100 for 30 minutes"
"I'll betcha that Heimlich guy gets a lot of pats on the back."
"Cop: we know you're in there. Me in a French accent: I am not ere, I am in France. Cop: when will you be back? Me: je ne comprends pas"
"The elephant asked the camel: ""Why do you have your breasts on your back?"" The camel, clearly irritated, replies: ""What a silly question from someone who has a dick on his face."""