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Joke of the Day

"Two Muslim vampires are discussing the weather... Vampire 1: It's really Sunni outside. Vampire 2: Shiite! Courtesy of my 8-year-old."

"I heard they finally updated the Encyclopedia of Chronology It's about time."

"I like my women like I like my Twinkies.. Cream-filled"

"If the shortened nickname for the Buccaneers is the Bucs, the Jaguars are the Jags, and the Patriots are the Pats... Then what do we call the Titans?"

"I can't find my lucky sweatpants. Now I'm going to totally bomb this job interview."

"How can you tell a bernie sanders supporter from a hillary supporter? There age"

"What are the two biggest lies in Wyoming? My truck is paid for, and honestly officer, I was just helping the sheep over the fence."

"I think my wife is changing our son's diapers too often. It says right on the box that they're good for up to 14lbs."

"A pirate walks into a bar with his ship's steering wheel shoved down his pants. The bartender says, ""hey pirate that's got to be hard to walk with."" Pirate says, ""aye, it be driving me nuts."""

"Why did 9 bust 1? Because 6 8 9"