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Joke of the Day

"HR: The delivery job is yours. Me: Great! HR: Do u have a reliable car? Me: Yes. HR: Model? Me: A little in college. How is that relevant?"

"What do you say to a black man in a suit? Will the defendant please rise?"

"A Mexican walked into a Polish store and greeted every one. He was handed a sausage. Edit: Ok I will walk myself out..."

"People always say pigs can't fly like they've never seen a police helicopter before."

"I'm not sure if this woman in the Starbucks line ahead of me is ordering a drink or casting a spell."

"If I come to your house and you say ""make yourself at home"", don't get mad when I take my pants off and drink your beer."

"I've been having an affair with a film director's wife. Yesterday he caught us in bed together. He was furious. I said to him, ""Look, mate, don't make a scene."""

"Boy born with no eyelids! The Dr. used the foreskin from the circumcision. Now the boy is cockeyed"

"What does a forward thinking person say? wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww"

"They say the best way to prepare your kids for loss in later life is to have pets. So I bought a puppy and shot it in front of them. I'm not having my kids growing up damaged."