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Joke of the Day
"Why was the computer stressed out when it got home? Because it had a hard drive."
Next Joke
"Just unfollowed Taylor Swift on Twitter. Expecting a song within the hour"
"Your mom's got eight vaginas and a Ph.D. We call her Dr. Octopus."
"Why does Donald Trump secretly want to lose the election? To Make America Great Again"
"All generalizations are false, including this one."
"How do they launch a champagne factory? They throw a boat at it."
"I'm working on a script about a mobster who attempts to reinvent himself as a professional photographer. I'm gonna call it... *The Selfie Made Man.*"
"Tower: Shamu two-two please state estimated time of arrival. Pilot: Ok let's see... I think Tuesday would be nice..."
"Q. How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb? A. Hell you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant."
"What's the difference between an Afghani Military Base and a Pakistani Elementary School? I don't know, I just fly the drone."