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Joke of the Day

"Palin: I'm seriously considering a presidential run. Reporter: Do you even know what the word seriously means? Palin: Don't refudiate me."

"What do you call a sleeping pizza? A pizzza"

"What do people drink at Club Obi-Wan? Qui-Gon Gin."

"When life hands you gators, make Gatorade...just kidding-that means life hates you because the gators would totally kill and eat you 1st."

"Why did the Fonz have red eyes? Because he had **AYYY** fever!"

"[Bookstore] Me: *hands over Tangled coloring book* Cashier: How old is your daughter? Me: [sweating nervously] Of course it is"

"There's a new Starbucks opening down the street. I WONDER WHAT IT WILL BE LIKE."

"The German folk singer was very dishonest with me. You could say that he lied."

"""Stay strong!"" I said to my wi-fi signal."

"Today I learned two things: 1. Build-A-Bear Workshop only lets you stuff fake animals 2. Mall security guards get to use real handcuffs"