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Joke of the Day

"This hot chick at the harbor said that she really dug the way that I ate those Oysters. All I could say was ""Shucks."""

"Some people like to stir the pot... ...I prefer to smoke it."

"i just thought of a funny line to use in my old age ""when i am having trouble peeing, i look down, and tell my penis to stop being a dick, and get on with it."""

"A sandwich walks into a bar... The bartender says we don't serve food here."

"Oh, topical reference. You sure are about something."

"""Mom can you pick me up a new comforter at the store?"" ""Okay"" *Mom returns with Morgan Freeman* ""I love you mom"""

"What does a shopping cart and a wheelchair have in common? They both can be used to carry vegetables...."

"A boy goes to the drug store to buy some condoms. 'Do you want a bag?', the cashier asks him 'No', the boy says, 'she isn't *that* ugly'"

"What were the 2 doctors who worked with Schrodinger called? A *paradox.*"

"Why couldn't Princess Leia get any dates? She was looking for Alderaan men."