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Joke of the Day

"I just invented a new word: [plagiarism](https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/277604/i_just_invented_a_new_word/)"

"I wrote a status about unemployment earlier, but didn't post it. It needs some work."

"Q: What kind of tree grows in your hand? A: A palm tree."

"The worst analogy ever is like pudding."

"Why do ghosts never age? They use Bootox."

"I'm no scientist, but harnessing the power of teen girls talking would probably solve all the world's energy woes."

"Why are black people unable to get a Ph.D.? Because they can't get past their masters."

"What do you call a fear of horned bovines? Aurochnophobia."

"I joined a 12-step program for people addicted to 12 step programs, Anonymous Anonymous. The 1st step is admitting you don't have a problem."

"How many Tourette's sufferers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fuck you god damn shit cunt just one of us asshole bitch bastard!"