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Joke of the Day

"I'm no scientist, but harnessing the power of teen girls talking would probably solve all the world's energy woes."

"What is the leading cause of pedophilia in America? Sexy children."

"(NSFW) My girlfriend dumped me because I couldn't give her the 12 inches she deserved.. I told that bitch ""I don't cut 2 inches off for anybody!"""

"LPT: Think content you are looking for has been removed from the internet? Just ask the NSA, They always keep backups!"

"What does it mean when they say my car needs ""more low"" I don't know, I don't speak Little Bitch."

"If you're American & I ever hear you use the word ""whilst,"" this I swear: you will not live to see the 3rd season of Sherlock."

"I don't know what you guys are talking about. I drank pineapple juice earlier and my jizz doesn't taste any different."

"I have no regrets. By which I mean I regret not saying no more often."

"What do you get if you cross a black person with an octopus? I don't know but it would be excellent at picking cotton."

"Have you met the mushroom man? He's a real fun guy."