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Joke of the Day

"On the one hand, when I masturbate, I feel like I'm cheating on my wife... ...but on the other hand, I don't."

"What do you feed someone in a coma from breakfast? Coma-toast."

"There's an app for everything today except premature ejaculation but I hear that it's coming soon"

"what do you think of the number 4? you mean like on a scale of 1 to 10? stolen from: https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/31g6qc/i_am_a_don_hertzfeldt_filmmaker_ama/cq1dzn8"

"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? to get to the other side."

"TIL the current Prime Minister of of Canada has a tattoo, and is in a cover band called the Van Cats, but... ...only the first part was Trudeau."

"Knock Knock..Whos there? Allah...Allah Who?..Snackbar!"

"What kind of rice puts you to sleep? Ray Rice"

"Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris called it quits. But I am looking forward to her next album devoted to the break-up called 'Calvin and Sobs'."

"Difference between GF & WIFE Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? A: 45 lbs. Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? A: 45 minutes."