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Joke of the Day

"MUSLIMS GO HOME! Your spouse called and is fixing dinner early. Please pick up some hummus on your way."

"Why did god give Women legs? So they didn't leave slug trails. My father told me that when I was 8 years old."

"You should never trust a molecule They make up everything."

"What do classical musicians write before going shopping? A Chopin Lizst (shopping list)"

"What do you call unpredictable nudity? Erratica."

"What do you find in a church's bathroom? Holy shit."

"""Give me your Vitamin Water and your organic gluten-free cookies unless there's peanuts in them because I'm allergic."" - 2012 school bully"

"How do puppets have sex? No strings attached."

"How do you stop a dog from barking in your front yard... Put him in the backyard"

"When the police asked me where I was between 4 and 5, apparently ""Kindergarten"" wasn't the answer he was looking for."