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Joke of the Day

"A Jamaican is asked, use Dandelion in a sentence ... He then says ... ""The cheetah is faster dandelion"""

"Oh, a BEAR hug. *starts putting clothes back on*"

"Me: Why doesn't he love me? Nachos: Eat more of me and find out! Me: *Chewing* So? Nachos: We need outside counsel. Send pizza down here."

"Need Help with a prank I stole a co-workers pen the other day, (really nice pen) as a joke. I want to send them a ransome letter. Can anyone help me out? Thanks"

"Why do Leprechauns laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls."

"Overheard @ high school's red & white football game Clueless freshman: ""So, who are we playing?"" Crowd: ""It's intrasquad!"" Pregnant pause. Clueless freshman: ""So we're still going to lose!"""

"My remaining Scrabble tiles were PENSI, so I played the name of a long, hard body part ... ... SPINE."

"Can you cure hereditary diarrhea? Or does it just run through your jeans?"

"What do you call a zoo that only has one dog? A shit-zoo."

"How long does it take for stormtroopers to obey Kylo Ren? Just the First Order."