217514

Joke of the Day

"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60 She's 93 now and we don't know where the hell she is."

"I googled 'Gary Oldman' and left off the 'r' It was the longest 3 hours of my life."

"What did the native american say the first time he saw a bicycle? Wow, white folks are pretty smart. They run sitting down. *Feel free to apply the racist native american accent of your choice.*"

"A cowboy walks into a German car dealership and says ""Audi, pardner."""

"What does an LGBT rabbi call a blessing? a brucea"

"I think that if Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh had their brains swapped, the world would be better because that surgery sounds really risky."

"A boob job sounds like the best job in the world."

"What do the Bermuda Triangle and a blonde have in common? They both swallow a lot of seamen. Ahh stupid jokes. They never get old."

"Sally sells seashells by the seashore. Her monopoly has left the seashore economy in shambles. 86% of hermit crabs are now homeless."

"[First Date] HER: I love dogs. ME: [Trying to impress her] Waiter, give us your finest Labrador - medium rare."