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Joke of the Day

"I think that if Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh had their brains swapped, the world would be better because that surgery sounds really risky."

"12 ways to cut down on clickbait! This wasn't one of them"

"When I ask for a threesome with you and your best friend, I am only joking... Unless the answer is yes... In which case, can I videotape it?"

"When I see a person with facial tattoos, I also know that I will see them in handcuffs if I follow them around long enough."

"[first date questions] You like meat? I make killer beef jerky with leftover hobo carcasses...and she's gone Whatever she's probably vegan"

"[turns to guy at next urinal] ""When the Little Mermaid became human how did she know how to use a toilet? BIG-TIME plot hole in my opinion"""

"""Why does that guy always get all the women?"" ""I don't know...he isn't very handsome or rich"" ""And he's a terrible conversationalist - all he does is sit there licking his eyebrows"""

"What do you call a journalist in Russia? An ambulance."

"You should never marry a tennis player. Apparently love means nothing to them."

"A woman walks into a bar... ...and ruins the joke."