215803

Joke of the Day

"I like to make a guy feel welcome in the morning by surrounding him with stuffed animals while he sleeps."

"what is the mods favorite joke? [deleted]"

"""Well I should probably get off twitter. I have to be at work in 15 minutes and I haven't even showered yet."" - me and at least 100 of you"

"Drugs are not a solution! Until you mix them with water"

"*sees a racoon in the neighbor's trash* I won't say anything if you don't. *continues rummaging*"

"What does a stripper do to her asshole before work? She drops him off at band practice."

"Sarah Palin's political integrity. Because she's ~~a woman~~ an idiot."

"Which type of bees make milk? Boo-bees"

"They told me I had type ""A"" blood... turns out it was a typo."

"MURICANS Those who speak 3 language are trilingual , Those who speak 2 language are bilingual And those who speak one language are AMERICANS"