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Joke of the Day

"The clowns I hire always seem surprised to find I'm the only party guest."

"People r afraid of boogers. I bet u could rob a bank with a booger! Folks in the bank would back up! Police would be puzzled tho: A Bogger?!"

"Why should a good driver always carry weed in his car? So he always hits the green when he's driving."

"What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow? You can't milk a cow for 15 years."

"Neverland Ranch Why did Michael Jackson build Neverland Ranch? He was fucking immature."

"Women who say, ""Awwww..."" after everything they hear are quite possibly the most annoying assholes on the planet."

"""Hey buddy, what's up?!!"" -- short honk ""I WILL KILL YOU AND EVERYONE YOU LOVE"" -- long honk"

"Spaghetti, because you didn't like that shirt anyways"

"A heart-shaped pizza just means less pizza and that's not a sacrifice I'm willing to make for love."

"I finally found an onramp for the road to success!!!! It was closed for construction."