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Joke of the Day

"Brother: How do you top a car ? Sister: Tep on the brake tupid."

"What did the Pilipino orphan boy say to the linguist who wanted to adopt him? I'll tagalog!"

"So a pirate walks into a bar, he has a steering wheel on his crotch. The bartender goes: ""What are you doing with that thing?"" The pirate responds: ""Arr, its been drivin' me nuts."""

"Do you know the difference between me and eggs? Eggs get laid."

"Why is it everything I love is either unhealthy, addicting or has multiple restraining orders against me?"

"Geophysics Joke That argument is so weak, it can still be measured on the Richter Scale! Randomly popped into my head while watching an earthquake documentary."

"What type of music do astronauts love? Neptunes!"

"Hormonal teenage daughter: Where do you want to be buried? Me: You mean after I die, right?"

"People love making jokes about camouflage but I just don't see the humor."

"If your conservative parents piss you off over the holidays, come out to them. You don't even have to be gay, it's just a fun thing to do."