211989

Joke of the Day

"Never break someone's heart because they have only one inside...break their bones because they have 206 of them."

"I have sex daily. I mean, dyslexia! Fcuk"

"My doctor just told me I have Alzheimers... The only thing I can do now is figure out why I'm at this hospital"

"Doctor Doctor I think I'm a bridge What's come over you? Oh two cars a large truck and a coach."

"How do you get a Harvard Graduate off your porch? You pay him for the pizza."

"I read a sad statistic that something like 2% of all sushi goes un-Instagrammed."

"Where could you look up Joan of Arc's profile? On Tinder."

"How do you start an insect race ? One two flea - go"

"I just went to the bathroom without my phone. I had to read shampoo bottles like it was 1999."

"What the difference between a fridge and a virgina? Fridge don't fart when you take the meat out"