211909

Joke of the Day

"A girl approaches a guy... Girl: Do you drink? Guy: No. Girl: Do you do drugs? Guy: No. Girl: Do you watch porn? Guy: No. Girl: Then how do you have fun? Guy: I lie to people."

"What do call having to settle for buying corn? Compra maize."

"If I can make even one person laugh on here then I'm not doing my job. The job I actually get paid for."

"I Bet If The Moon Found Out What It Means To Moon Somebody It Would Feel Bummed."

"Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff... http://instantrimshot.com/"

"What do you call a crime-solving blender. Deducer"

"I've seen: UFOs Ghosts A Two Headed Turtle Kimodo Dragons But nothing is as unbelievable to me as seeing Trump run for president."

"My family is German. I've learned the hard way not to get drunk. The hangovers aren't the problem, but for some reason I keep waking up in Poland, and all my Jewish neighbors keep vanishing..."

"How Do they say ""F**k You"" in Hollywood? ""Trust Me..."""