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Joke of the Day

"Why does Oedipus hate profanity? He kisses his mother with that mouth."

"Young Billy stuck the knife into the outlet... He said it was a shocking surprise."

"I really hope my family doesn't give me a urinal cake again for my birthday this year."

"I'm gonna start a company where I drive people around to haunted places. It'll be called Ghost Bus Tours"

"If you see a cat with a dart in it, that's my cat and I need him back, we aren't done yet."

"My girlfriend said she needs time and distance does that mean she is calculating velocity?"

"I think we figured out which one was Destiny's child."

"What do you call a sleepwalking nun? A roamin Catholic."

"I cheated on my girlfriend yesterday We were playing Monopoly, she left and I stole some money from the bank. Then I went upstairs and fucked her sister."

"What did Captain Kirk find at the end of the rainbow? a LepreKHAAAAAAN!"