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Joke of the Day
"Tiger Woods: cool name, scary place"
Next Joke
"Idea: ATM that sends you encouraging messages like ""You Can Do it"" or ""Ramen Noodles Aren't So Bad"" when you check your sad Account Balance"
"My Roommate wanted me to play the popular game Fuck, Marry, Kill... But now I am confused. What should I do with my husband's dead body?"
"A coworker just asked me how I stay so thin so I responded ""I don't post pictures of my food online"" and I think she believed me."
"The man who went to the bar with a gun. A man comes in a bar with a gun in his hands and yells ""Who the hell fucked my wife!?"", a voice at the back says ""you don't have enough bullets, mate!"""
"What do you call it when you kill someone with your bad breath from a long distance away? No scope"
"What do you call a pair of snakeskin trousers? Serpants."
"I woke up hungover but couldn't make myself throw up. So I guess I have a lotta shit to deal with today."
"The Koala should be classified as a bear It has all the Koalafications"
"""Hey kids, you like candy?"" I said to my own kids, luring them into my van so I could get them to school and be at work on time."