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Joke of the Day

"Seal loses electron Did you hear about the seal that lost an electron? It's now a seal ion."

"I like my coffee how I like my slaves Free"

"I have only two requests for when I die. #1. I want my remains scattered around Wrigley Field. \#2. I don't want to be cremated first."

"What do you call a spiderman that's good at sex? Peter Parker"

"To a guy who said that my jokes about animals are bad I can't bear with it."

"How did Ellen Pao get her job as CEO or Reddit? [Deleted]"

"You don't need to wear clothes in public if you can run fast enough."

"To all of you who tweet constantly about drinking wine... Somebody has to say it. GRAPE JOKES AREN'T FUNNY."

"What's the difference between a musician and a dead body? One composes, the other decomposes..."

"I tried to be polite and hold the door open for a woman, but she kept screaming, ""I'm peeing in here!"""