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Joke of the Day
"This is by far the most pointless Tweet ever."
Next Joke
"What's up? Up is the Y-axis relative vertical direction opposed to down."
"""Do you want to see a nice clock?"" I said, lowering my trousers, ""That's not a clock!"" She exclaimed when she saw my dick... It will be when you put two hands and a face on it!"
"Customs officials in Europe recently seized a shipment of cocaine that was addressed to the Vatican. Which can only mean that Toronto Mayor Rob Ford just received a giant box of communion wafers."
"Two Jewish businessmen meet in the street. ""Oy Abraham I'm sorry to hear about that fire at your warehouse"". ""Ssh!"" hisses the other ""It's not till next week""."
"A priest, a nun, a rabbi, a blonde, a brunette, a redhead, a farmer, his daughter, a horse, a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy all walk into a bar. The bartender says, ""What is this? A joke?"""
"Why don't black people make good calculus problems (warning: racist) Because they'll never be integrated."
"I hear it's snowing steadily in Istanbul... In fact, in Istanbul they can't stop the snowplow"
"""Nailed it."" -inventor of crucifixion"
"What did the Pink Panther say after he sprayed raid on an anthill? *Dead ant. Dead ant. Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant.*"