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Joke of the Day

"My wife asked me to play doctor with her... ...she is now waiting for three hours in front of the bedroom."

"A guy forgot to pay his exorcist... He got repossessed."

"I'm so done with Apple products! Their phones can't do jack..."

"Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant. Ten minutes into the meal, Luke's still having trouble with the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere. Obi-Wan finally snaps, ""Use the forks, Luke."""

"Dating. I met my wife at a Singles Bar. Funny thing is, I thought she was at home looking after the kids."

"""ICE BUCKET CHALLENGE LOL!"" -captain of the Titanic"

"Why was Hitler a great comedian? Cuz you can't spell slaughter without laughter"

"I accidentally got my mom prego... :( She wanted Ragu."

"ME: How much for this aggressive bottle of water? FIREFIGHTER: Sir that's a hydrant"

"An assistant to a company's offices in Karnataka found the title on his business card embarrassingly abbreviated. ""Mysore Ass."""