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Joke of the Day
"A guy forgot to pay his exorcist... He got repossessed."
Next Joke
"""911? Yes I need to report an incident"" ""What is it mam?"" ""THIS. GIRL. IS. ON. FIRE!"" ""Getting real tired of this crap, Alicia."""
"I can tell my Girlfriends ass is getting bigger, She fits in my Wife's jeans."
"Doctor: ""I need to draw some blood."" Me: ""Okay."" Doctor: ""Do you have a red crayon I could borrow?"""
"What do you call a man who cleans out toilets ? Lou !"
"Mars: I'm wet... NASA: I'm coming!"
"If your Facebook picture is a photo of a sunset or something inanimate, I'll assume you have a dissociative identity disorder."
"My girlfriend is like -100. She's a 10 but she is also imaginary"
"I told my boss I needed a raise to stay at work because there are three different companies showing interest in me... He asked me which companies and I told him, ""The gas, electric, and cable ones"""
"Been throwing up gang signs all morning. Must've eaten some expired gang signs"