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Joke of the Day

"As I exposed my glorious chest hairs & catapulted toward the Velcro wall, I realized that I had no exit strategy."

"I saw a giraffe with a short neck It was sad, or a deer"

"What do you call a fat town Obe-CITY"

"I don't blame people for not wanting Merrick Garland in the Supreme Court I would be scared too if I had to work with the Incredible Hulk in his later years."

"If you're telling a story to a group and are interrupted and then no one asks you to continue, ruin their party by drowning in the pool."

"Q: Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: He was hit by a bus"

"(WW1 1915) ENGLISH GENERAL: Plan? ENGLISH LIEUTENANT: Well, the trenches can be used to- ENGLISH MAJOR: to symbolise man's emptiness, yes..."

"I hate it when I get my days mixed up and I accidentally take my stupid wife out instead of my girlfriend."

"Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. After all, he killed Hitler."

"[OC] where did the cavemen live? Neandertown!"