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Joke of the Day
"[at a funeral home] ME: One death please"
Next Joke
"Bro: Dude, is this YOUR Shakira CD??? Me: What? No....it's my wife's..... Hips: No.... It's his... Me: Shut up Hips!"
"I can't believe the Toronto maple leafs even have a website They can't even put THREE W's together!"
"I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my Grandfather Not screaming in terror like his passengers"
"Return of the Jedi is not possible without the receipt of the Jedi."
"I didn't think Miss Hilton could consume all those painkillers at once, but wow! Paracetomol!"
"What do I do if my bank won't take my blood covered cash? Launder it. Source: http://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/38kmj9/what_do_i_do_if_the_bank_wont_take_my/crwbpxe"
"Headphone Jack [Removed]"
"Thomas Jefferson's dad's name was Thomas Jefferdad. Really makes you think"
"Do you know how the store Menards got its name? A pirate was kicked in the nuts and he went, ""Arr! Me-nards!"""