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Joke of the Day

"How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? Suck his dick."

"I set up a trap to catch the tooth fairy but she caught on and placed my parents in the trap instead. what a tricky fairy. PS. i want my $1!"

"A dad is suspicious, and asks his teenager ""Son, would you pass a drug test right now?"" ""Sure, I know all about drugs - quiz me!"""

"Have you heard about the new line of Tampax with bells and tinsel? It's for the Christmas period."

"Somebody needs to tell Tim Burton about the other actors"

"Top uses for Golf Balls: 1. Describing hail storms 2. Describing tumors 3. Playing golf"

"*Giant boulder slowly crushes several hundred cats* Guy who's about to invent the bagpipes: Hey, this gives me an idea!"

"What's the difference between a girl and a washing machine? When I dump a load into the washing machine it doesn't follow me around"

"Imagine if you found a dresser made by Jesus during his ""carpenter"" days. The guys on Antique Roadshow would lose their minds."

"What is programmers' favorite wine? [yellow tail]"