202425

Joke of the Day

"Ask your doctor if being a doctor is right for him. Everything isn't about you."

"I'm here to make a donation. Nun: Blessings, the orphans could use... *Shoving my kid at her- A brother? I'd like a receipt. For my taxes."

"My girlfriend has terrible eyesight... she's always accidentally sleeping with other guys. Poor girl."

"I secretly love men from Scotland... It's my kilty pleasure."

"What do you call a blonde standing on her head? A brunette with bad breath."

"Things I'm doing today * going to the gym * having sex * lying"

"How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None! ... They just beat the room for being black."

"Billy Joel was hospitalized last week. He had a heart attack ack ack ack ack ack. You oughtta know by now."

"When I die My only wish is that I die in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming and yelling for help like the passengers in his car."

"Did you hear about the Mechanic who slept under the car? He wanted to wake up oily in the morning."