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Joke of the Day

"Billy Joel was hospitalized last week. He had a heart attack ack ack ack ack ack. You oughtta know by now."

"I was disappointed to learn Flickr is not a site about female masturbation."

"What is them difference between a horse and a Harley Davidson? On a Harley, the dick is on the top."

"I'm a bit of a self deprecating comedian, I must admit, I'm not very good."

"Now that the new bills have Harriet Tubman on them... if you put one on a television does that make it a tele-tubbie?"

"""If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you-"" *interrupting* haha, he said prick"

"Fun prank: Super glue a baby to the floor and see how many people try to pick it up as they walk by"

"Turtle + Porcupine = Slowpoke"

"What do you get if you shoot a Mexican golfer? A hole in Juan."

"My friend gets offended when people tell fat jokes. I told her to lighten up."