199822

Joke of the Day

"I just found a fruit roll-up in my pocket That means one of my kids has a grape flavored blunt rap in their lunch box."

"I don't usually post on this sub, so here goes nothing..."

"I'd do anything to never be hungover again Except stop drinking"

"Why couldn't anyone trust the snowman to do anything? He was kinda flakey"

"Did you hear about the guy who escaped from a lunatic asylum, raped a bunch of old women in a laundrette then ran away? The newspaper headlines the next day read: #**NUT SCREWS WASHERS AND BOLTS**#"

"My girlfriend was sucking my dick...... My girlfriend was sucking my dick when she took it out of her mouth and said ""I don't really like the way dicks look."" I said ""Hmmm, it must be about taste"""

"What would you call an uprising at Charles Xavier's school? A mutant-y"

"Reasons I Don't Smoke Pot"

"Wanna hear a joke? My mute friend told me this one."

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? No ideer."