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Joke of the Day

"As much as I disagree with Donald Trumps policies, we agree one one major and vital thing... We would both love to fuck his daughter."

"Do you think Lincoln was good at pleasuring the ladies? If he was, did they call him the pounding father?"

"What do deviant nuns have? Big bad habits."

"I told my wife I want to try anal sex... She said she's been having anal sex for years. My entire life is the joke."

"Paddy was rushed to hospital after he became slightly ill at the boxing gym It was only belly ache, but he tried to swallow the medicine ball."

"Solar powered watch free to collector This is not a wind up."

"Mind: Be careful to protect yourself and don't jump right in. Heart: CANNONBALL!!!"

"There is a chair... And it is walking, down the street, with shoes."

"[couples therapy] Mrs: he's too handsy, always touching me all over... Mr: [who is an octopus] I CANT HELP IT LINDA IM LIKE 90% HANDS..."

"Fords new heated tailgates.. Fords working on a new heated tailgate feature, that way when you have to push it in the snow your hands won't be cold."