197918

Joke of the Day

"Here's what I've been thinking... How can a male have nut allergies?"

"What's the difference between a stoner and a Jew? A stoner gets baked more than once"

"I was talking to my buddy about 50 Shades Of Grey He said ""yeah, my wife and I have been doing S&M for years."" ""Really!"", I said, ""I had no idea!"" ""Sure,"" he said, ""she sleeps and I masturbate!"""

"A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants... The bartender says ""Hey! You know you've got a steering wheel in your pants?"" The pirate replies: ""ARRR it's drivin' me nuts!"""

"Did you hear about the new WinZip movie? They had too many cast members causing extra acting issues."

"Marriage: where all the excitement, laughter and sex is gone but she's still there."

"I'm waiting for Twitter to be adapted into a big budget sci-fi action movie: ""In space no one can hear you tweet."""

"How many lawyers does it take to grease a combine? Only one if you run him through slowly!"

"Religious gardening rising in popularity with today's youth. Parents around the nation are alarmed at their teens obsession with Sects and Violets."

"If my mouth could get pregnant, an entire box of fudge-pops would be taking paternity tests."