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Joke of the Day

"When I'm bored, nobody texts me. When I'm busy, BAM! I'm the most popular person in the world."

"I've been to 3 different specialists at the Foxsworthy Institute and they still can't be sure whether or not I'm a Redneck. I'm losing hope"

"Knock knock. Whose there? Doctor. Doctor who? Oh. You watch that show too?"

"What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve? (Sorry if you've heard this) Christopher Walken"

"Probably the hardest part about being God is deciding between two equally terrible youth soccer teams that have just prayed to win."

"Drunk people are so self centred... ... they think the world revolves around them"

"What's a Chinese dentist's favorite time? Tooth Hurty"

"Three cookies were crossing the road when the first one was knocked down. What did the third cookie say as he reached the pavement in safety? Crumbs!"

"I'm really sick of the ""ebola cereal"" joke... I'm pretty sure that's the last thing you'll find in Africa."

"No relationship is perfect so you might as well pick the perfect person you want to go through hell with"