196775

Joke of the Day

"Praying Mantis wife: Are u cheating on me? Praying Mantis husband [his missing head replaced by a marble]: What on earth gave u that idea?"

"So I decided to write a song about tortillas... Well, it's actually more of a wrap."

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Roadkill Barbie ...unrecognizable"

"In what realm does Thor use his hammer the most? Milfheim"

"3 guys go into a bar 3 Guys walking into a bar. A Mexican, a black guy, and and a jew. The bartender looks up and says, ""get the fuck out"""

"My friend told me he was terrified of pedophiles... I told him to grow up."

"eer booze and fun!' 'A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender asks the seal ""What's your pleasure?"" The seal replies ""Anything but Canadian Club."""

"What did Matthew McConaughey yell at the drive that was about to miss his turn? A right a right a right!"

"My dad got fired recently for sleeping on the job. He didn't like being a pilot that much anyway."

"Can February march? No, But April May."