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Joke of the Day

"eer booze and fun!' 'A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender asks the seal ""What's your pleasure?"" The seal replies ""Anything but Canadian Club."""

"Why is China a communist country? Because nobody wants to hold an erection."

"How do you tell a chemist from a non-chemist? Ask them to pronounce 'unionized.'"

"Doctor Strange, Weird Al, and Oddjob walk into a bar... that's a very unusual event."

"A long time ago, I learned the importance of just being myself. I think the world would be a better place if everyone would just be myself."

"Hi. This is my first time at yoga. When I called they said to bring a Matt. *points at man standing next to her* Now what do we do with him?"

"What did the black kid get on his ACT? BBQ sauce"

"Beauty is in the Eye Of The Tiger."

"What do you call an indentured servant hired specifically to cut meat for you? A *Filet Minion*."

"My friend asked me if I wanted to walk down a hill with him. I declined."