196743

Joke of the Day

"Why can't Shia Joe travel in eastern Pennsylvania? Because it's always Sunni in Philadelphia."

"when it snows are snowmen ever like holy shit it's my flesh"

"I sexually identify as a Canadian... I'm eh-sexual."

"[sees a baby spit up after drinking from baby bottle] ""lmao yo who invited the lightweight"""

"I'm that guy who plays Pictionary and draws the shittiest representation of the clue and spends the entire time circling it at various speed"

"All the jokes on this subreddit... are fresh and original!"

"I feel like every time a GOP candidate drops out, Oompa Loompas should appear & sing a song to teach us about the perils of gluttony & greed"

"Take your time, Officer. I have nothing but respect for the law. Your imminent death on this dark side street can wait."

"I came 2nd in a Fidel Castro look-a-like competition.. close but no cigar"

"Breaking up on Twitter: It's not @you it's @me."