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Joke of the Day

"What's dirtier than grease on Olivia Newton John? Cum on Eileen."

"A. Schwarzenegger has it long, Brad Pitt short, Madonna does not have it and the Pope does not use it. What is it? A surname."

"There is simply no need to add ""NSFW"" in your bio. This is twitter. None of us have jobs."

"What is the difference between most of these jokes on this sub and a bucket full of shit? The bucket."

"Mattel has a campaign urging girls to pursue their limitless potential. It's called You Can Be Anything Except A Woman With Barbie's Body."

"How does Yo-Yo Ma answer the phone? Cello?"

"What do you call an orphan who grows up and becomes a priest? Father Les. And yes, as a matter of fact, I am a dad."

"I went to my highschool reunion and came across a woman I'd never seen before. Luckily she didn't notice."

"Remember when vampires didn't sparkle, and you killed them rather than french kissed them."

"Is it wrong to hate a certain race? Because I'm not really a fan of the Indy 500"