195466
Joke of the Day
"I'm going to go stand outside. If anyone asks, tell them, I'm outstanding."
Next Joke
"The toilet at my local Police Station has been stolen. Cops have nothing to go on"
"How do dubstep DJs masturbate? They wub one out"
"I got stopped by a woman in the street today. She said, ""Excuse me, sir, have you had an accident in the last three years that wasn't your fault?"" I said, ""Yes, she's nearly 2 now."""
"I'm sorry, this is awkward. Those weather maps are interesting but I'm actually looking for a ""meaty urologist."""
"My wife asked if I was coming to our daughter's dance recital... I was, but I paused the video, pulled up my pants, and denied it."
"FBI: If you testify you'll have to go into the Witness Protection Program ME: I'll do it FBI: Your wife and kids too ME: Oh ok never mind"
"When someone cries, ""No one gets me"" I immediately snatch them and put them in my trunk and yell, ""I got you""!"
"Finally tried Viagra,... Damn near broke my hand!"
"yo momma so fat when her name was the answer to a crossword clue, it was 10 spaces down and 10000 spaces WIDE!"