84310

Joke of the Day

"My wife asked if I was coming to our daughter's dance recital... I was, but I paused the video, pulled up my pants, and denied it."

"Baby seal walks into a club... ..."

"No Shave November No Deodorant December Lose Your Job January Forget To Pay Rent February Move in With Mom and Dad March"

"A man walks into a bar... The man is now in a serious coma since he was stupid enough not to wear a hardhat in a construction zone."

"What's Bruce Lee's favorite hotel to stay at? The HYATT!!"

"I made a really sexy gravy. It was saucy. I put a few raisins in it, but it started getting fruity."

"Why did the smart phone eat a lot? It had a big APPetite"

"How often do I drink Blue Moon? Once in awhile."

"How many black guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one - you fucking bigot."

"What do you call a mathematician who drinks too much? A functioning alcoholic."