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Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't a skeleton fall in love with a human. maybe it's Because the skeleton doesn't have a heart."

"I do not like them in my inbox. I do not like them from a blond fox. I do not like your webcam spam. I do not like them, Scam I Am."

"How do you make a car top? You gotta 'tep on the brake 'tupid!"

"[describing sketch artist to criminal] He was pretty good at drawing pictures."

"Bird of peace? The dove Bird of war? The hawk Bird of true love? ..wait for it... .... The swallow *walks offstage"

"Studies show unprotected sex has over an 8 percent chance of causing Cancer. The same study found a near equal chance of causing Gemini or Sagittarius."

"People with little chains that go from a nose piercing to an earring probably just got sick of losing their ears."

"What did the old fly say to the young fly? I've seen a lot of shit!"

"Starlord: Galaxy. Superman: Earth. Spiderman: NYC. And then there's Daredevil micromanaging the shit out of 10 blocks in midtown Manhattan."

"Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, the very next day you told me you're gay...."