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Joke of the Day

"Two gay men are having sex when a fire breaks out in their apartment. Who gets out first, the top or the bottom? The bottom-- he already has his shit packed."

"I remember the first time I had sex, I put the condom on the wrong way round. The girl looked and me and said, ""You're so stupid"" I said, ""What?"" ""You're supposed to do that before sex."" she replied."

"Chairman: Ok so we've decided a group of crows is called a flock? Creepy Frank: *licking a knife* I've got a better idea"

"People who mispronounce Grand Prix... ...are just grand pricks."

"Why did the rock band get in serious treble? They failed on a consistent bassist."

"The milk in my fridge is so old it thinks Elvis Presley's dancing is inappropriate."

"What is a dog covered in poo called? A SHIT-szu. I thought of this due to the fact that my Shitszu came inside covered in mud."

"After all these years, Bono 'still hasn't found what he's looking for'. Perhaps he might have more luck if he took those stupid sunglasses off..."

"What's the worlds longest sentence? I do."

"I've decided to leave my past behind So if I owe you money, I'm sorry but I've moved on."