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Joke of the Day

"Maybe leave yourself in a hot car with a window open one inch for 15 minutes while your dog runs into the store"

Next Joke
 
"Why is Steve Jobs middle child unemployed? Because he's always inbetween jobs."
"*deliberately drops paper in front of cute girl* Oh my goodness was that my...(sexy voice) political science degree"
"Two cashews walk into a bar... The Bartender says ""How about a glass of our most expensive wine?"" The Cashews reply, ""Do you think we're Nuts?!"""
"why can,t you trust a Atom Because thay make up every thing"
"Robin Williams dead. Police suspect arson, but I Doubtfire."
"My 1 year old doesn't laugh when I fart. I can only hope his sense of humor grows more sophisticated with time..."
"What do you call a cannibal who eats quadriplegics? Vegetarians."
"Me: Sorry I got drunk and ate all the bacon. Wife: You ate Beggin' Strips. *me to the dog* Sorry I got drunk and ate all of your bacon."
"Doctor Doctor I'm scared of Father Christmas Doctor: You're suffering from Claus-trophobia."