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Joke of the Day

"Dinner: I BIT THE INSIDE OF MY MOUTH! IT WILL NEVER HEAL! NOTHING WILL EVER BE RIGHT AGAIN! Next morning: Oh, OK."

"[Meta] the number of subscribers in this sub is a joke right? Did I miss something?"

"What do you call a female cop that shaves her vag? A Cunt stubble"

"Why is yogurt always in debt? Because it's Greek."

"Went to a shrink today. She said I have a split personality. Charged me 84.00. I paid her 42.00 and told her to get the rest from the other b*tch!"

"What does Darth Vader identify as on Tumblr? Ana-kin"

"Dear Social Media, thanks for showing me that I can like people. So long as I don't have to see, touch, or smell them."

"OMG I love you You're the best You left me Did you bring me stuff OMG Anything I don't care Where have you been I smell someone else -Dogs"

"What are the unspoken rules of sign language? All of them"

"Did you hear about the birds who wanted to go out drinking? They ended up at the crowbar."