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Joke of the Day

"Bill Gates be like: Hi,my name is Bill Gates, Let me teach you how to count: 1, 2, 3, 95, NT, 200, XP, VISTA, 7, 8, 10 Now give me money."

"Who invented King Arthur's Round Table? Sir Cumference!"

"Racist jokes my dad told me Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza A pizza can feed a family"

"What did the philosophically-wise Mongol general say to motivate himself? I'm not Immanuel Kant. I'm Genghis Kahn!"

"If your smartphone is wet.. .. put it into a bottle of rice. The rice will then attract asians who will repair it."

"What's the difference between a penis and a paycheck? A woman will always blow your paycheck"

"Priest: Do you read to your kids from the Good Book? Me: Every night Priest: What's their favorite part? Me: When Frodo destroys the ring"

"Judge: *whispering* pls stop introducing yourself like this just because u work in my chambers it doesn't m- Me: YES HI IM HIS CHAMBERMAID"

"Obama used the race card. Hillary used the woman card. America used the Trump card."

"A Harry Houdini Joke What is one thing Harry Houdini can't escape from? Stomach punches"