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Joke of the Day

"Job interview... H- ""So how would you describe yourself?"" Me- ""Verbally but just incase I prepared a dance"".."

"What would happen if pigs could fly? Bacon would go up!"

"I want to be a father someday But my son says I should start now"

"What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russell"

"i bet all the girls say ""i bet you say that to all the girls"" to all the guys."

"A canibal walks out of the restroom and looks to his friend... ...He then says, ""I shat the sheriff, but I did not shit the deputy"""

"What's the word that starts with 'n', ends with 'r', and you wouldn't ever want to call a black guy? Neighbor"

"me: it's too hot *opens window* *in comes 305430 flies, 43866 spiders, 91193 moths, a serial killer, a paedophile and a burglar* (HELP)"

"Turns out those miniature liquor bottles aren't for babies and now my brother says I can't be the God Mother."

"WIFE: there's a bear outside our tent ME: so W: so scare him off M: *unzips door* Donald Trump might become president *bear jumps into fire*"