190046

Joke of the Day

"What do you call someone who sells sex in exchange for spaghetti? A pastatute."

"Why was the math book sad? It had a lot of problems"

"What is the 100% guaranteed way to get younger looking skin? Believe in reincarnation."

"All your responses must be oral, okay? Q: ""What school did you go to?"" A: ""Oral."""

"Did you hear about the fire at the bakery? No one was hurt but business is toast."

"Our mailman freaked out when he accidentally saw me naked. So did all the other people at the post office."

"We really need to respect organ donors... It takes guts to do what they do! (I'm sorry)"

"How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a bad joke teller? To get to the other side!"

"[hanging out w mob] ""Tony sleeps with the fishes"" *they all laugh* [self conscious about my sexual habits w fish]: its not a big deal guys"

"COP: do you know why I pulled you over? ME: *furiously trying to swallow a mouthful of mattress tag stickers* no"