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Joke of the Day
"My mom caught me smoking weed. She punished me by sending me to my room without any supper."
Next Joke
"It's bad enough I have to worry about people when I leave my house now I have to contend with Pokemon as well"
"Why did Microsoft skip windows 9? Because 7 ate 9"
"What do you call someone who serves smelly drinks? a Fartender"
"Where does the vampire deposit his savings? In the blood bank. And why did he like to deposit his savings there? Because everyone there helped increase his savings."
"This just popped in my head... What's a mexican's favorite Disney movie? Mow lawn. Sorry."
"Adulting so well today. Managed to make the bed while i was still in it. Now to figure out how to get out, without messing it up."
"A long time ago a friend of mine called me conceited, but after all these years I've found out that I'm just one swell guy."
"When I die, please bury me wrapped in a sheet. That way I won't have to look for one when I become a ghost"
"A child is like a blank slate. They make a horrible screeching sound when you drag your nails across their face."