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Joke of the Day

"If it weren't for pick-pocketers I'd have no sex life at all."

"If you were stranded on an island and could bring three items what would you bring? Michael Phelps, a saddle, and stick with a gold medal on the end."

"How do you get a drummer to drink a beer open it for him"

"Why did the crow go to the gym? To work on his caw strength."

"If you say ""That reminds me of a good story,"" I automatically think ""This story's gonna suck."""

"I hate brushing my teeth at night. It signifies I can't have any more food and I'm never ready for that kind of commitment."

"I still remember the first time I lied about being able to time travel. It was tomorrow."

"If lesbians don't like men, then why do they use dildos? Because scissoring just doesn't cut it."

"I was talking to my ex and she got the wrong end of the stick. The end that had been sharpened to a fine point."

"Resolva qualquer problema. E simples... escreva qual o problema e clique em resolver http://www.splitz.com.br/problem http://www.splitz.com.br/problem"