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Joke of the Day

"Saw a Ringneck Dove in our garden... ... so I wrung its neck."

"Dog Joak! FIRSED PART OF JOAK: how manny dogs does it take to scroo up a lite bulb? SECKENED PART OF JOAK: it dipends how you pyle the bodys."

"The dinner I was cooking for my family was going to be a surprise but the fire trucks ruined it."

"What is the difference between a goat and 9/11? You cannot milk a goat for 13 years"

"If I were a homeless guy, I'd walk up behind young women, put my arm around them & cop a feel on a boob because I have nothing to lose."

"What's the worst part about raping a deaf chick? You have to cut her fingers off so she can't tell anyone!"

"Why couldn't the whistle blower make it home for the holidays? he was snowden"

"Is there anything better than a good ol pat on the back.. to help you get out that last stubborn turd lodged up your sphincter?"

"I once farted in an apple store and people got evacuated.. ...because there wasn't any windows."

"Hey girl whats your sine? It must be 90 degrees because you're the 1."