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Joke of the Day

"Dog Joak! FIRSED PART OF JOAK: how manny dogs does it take to scroo up a lite bulb? SECKENED PART OF JOAK: it dipends how you pyle the bodys."

"What two things do prostitutes make? Hormones and hormones"

"I like my wine like I like my women. 10 years old and locked in a wooden crate in my basement."

"What do some people have against cheeseburgers? They say 'Burgers can't be cheesy!'"

"How many? How many pessimists does it take to change a light bulb? None - it's probably screwed it too tight anyhow!"

"The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza store... and says, ""Can you make me one with everything?"""

"What does a nosey pepper do? Get jalapeno business."

"I hired a personal trainer and my first 2 hour-long sessions were just him teaching me how to properly cut the sleeves off my t-shirts"

"Why is the founder of Comcast going to purgatory? He met St. Peter at the pearly gates and St. Peter said was, ""Please hold. Your soul is very important to us."""

"Word. ~ Microsoft."